Updated: Jun 28, 2022
My brother was killed at the age of 24. I was 29 years old, just had my third child and was on the verge of turning 30.
Three months after he died, I was sitting on the sidelines at my son's football game on my birthday and I couldn't stop crying.
Not only was I grieving my brother, but I had gained 30+ pounds and was completely uncomfortable in my jeans sitting there. My body was trying to save me from the immense stress it had been under after losing my brother but I didn't know that. All I knew was that I was heavier and was feeling awful.
As I progressed into my 30's, my health steadily declined, my weight steadily increased, and I had zero energy to do anything about it. I was miserable.
By the time I was 35, I was having panic attacks every morning before my 45-minute commute to work, I was seeing cardiologists and neurologists (because I was having chest pain, seizures and unexplained dizziness) and somehow through all of that, everything was "normal" and my primary doctor told me I needed to lose weight.
I wanted to lose weight and feel better but I what I really wanted was to play with my kids, stop feeling angry all of the time, and not be depressed any more.
Here's an old photo and this wasn't even at my heaviest.
Here's some of the insanity that I went through trying to "lose weight" like my doctor ordered:
I gained and lost the same 50 pounds at least 10 times (that's 500 pounds, y'all).
I went to cognitive behavioral therapy.
I never felt good - NEVER. Nothing helped me get my energy back or stop having the debilitating symptoms I was experiencing.
I tried every juice detox, weight loss challenge, sugar elimination diet, and over-the-counter weight loss supplement.
The story has a happy ending and it really has very little to do with my weight loss. So, how did I do it? I'll let you know tomorrow.
I just wanted to send you this email so you could get to know me a little better and see that I've been there too.